Hope for Disabilities

Fulfilling unmet needs in the disability community

Balancing Your Time

Posted by Emily Jensen on June 8, 2014 at 11:05 AM

There are so many different ways that we want to look at this topic, in hopes that it will benefit and serve everyone reading it. Balancing your time can be difficult in every single scenario no matter who you are, or what your life story is. Balancing your time is very important, so that you can live as much of a stress free life as possible. If you learn how to balance your time, you will notice that you can breathe easier knowing that you can juggle everything going on in your life without feeling like a failure. In the next few paragraphs, we hope to touch on all scenarios of time management and how it can easily become frustrating and emotionally exhausting. It is our hope that this blog post will give you the skills, tools, and hope that you might need to more efficiently balance your time, so that you can do it stress free, and confidently. We know that everyone carries different amounts of stress on their shoulders on a daily basis, and that is test and a challenge that we have all been given to face, but not all of us may have found the skills or tools necessary to be able to juggle the daily stressors in our lives.


If you are a single person, living on your own, that has little to no contact with family or friends, you might feel the physical, mental, or emotional burdens of trying to accomplish all of your daily tasks on your own. Some of these tasks may need to get done on a specific day, by a specific time, while other tasks may be able to wait, and be put off a day or two or maybe longer. These tasks can range from collecting the mail from the mail box to taking out the trash. One task is way more important to accomplish on a time line than the other might be unless you are expecting a gift or maybe money or something in the mail and you know that it will be arriving on a specific day, so you might run down to your mail box every half our to see if it has arrived yet, but that is not always a necessary thing to do. Taking out the trash on the other hand, if it does not get done within a reasonable amount of time, we all know what happens. It begins to stink up the house, and if left too long in certain temperatures and situations, it could lead to flies and other bugs, or maybe even pets getting into it. Another scenario for a single person who is living alone, you might have a television show that you want to watch, but you have a homework assignment, or a project for work that is due the following day. You need to balance your time, so that the priority is put first and then see if you have time for the fun stuff. If you have a dvr or a vcr, you can record your program if it is on when you need to be studying or getting your project done for your boss at work and maybe watch your program that you are recording the following night when you have nothing on your agenda that needs to get done.


Relationships can be another area where some people may need to balance their time. You have recently met someone that you can see a future with, but you are finding that you no longer have time for your friends, your job, or other daily tasks that you have been neglecting to spend all of your, "free" time with the new love of your life. This is not healthy at all. You need to prioritize your time, so that you can spend a specific amount of time with the new love of your life, and yet maintain your job, and your household. If your relationship is meant to be, the other person will totally understand, and not take offense to the fact that you do have your own life outside of the relationship.


Marriage, whether it is your first marriage, or second marriage, or maybe even for some of you, third time's the charm, can be challenging in different ways. If you are bringing children from a previous marriage with you, and either the biological parent, or the step parent to be, has a diagnosis, or maybe the child has a diagnosis, you will all need to sit down as a family and talk about the diagnosis, so that any and all questions can be answered, so that everyone is on the same page, and any potential surprises can be put to rest, and things can go as smoothly as possible for all involved. In most cases, a step parent is making the choice to join the family and accept everyone for who they are, the way that they are, from the future spouse to the children who may be part of the blended family. A parent bringing a child into a blended family needs to completely evaluate the situation to determine if it is going to be a healthy fit for all involved, so that there is no anger, hatred, or resentment later by anyone. A parent bringing a, "special needs" child into a relationship, needs to get to know the person first before bring the child into the picture to evaluate who they are before letting them know about the child, and see if their tune changes when the subject is brought up that there is a child with, "special needs" that will be a part of the family either on a part time basis, or a full time basis, depending on the custody arrangements with the other biological parent if there is one in the picture, and if there is an agreement in place in regards to the child. Once you have decided that the other person in the relationship is potential step-parent material, you can slowly allow one on one time between your child and the future step-parent, so that they can slowly get to know each other and form a bond. The bond will not be formed overnight, and it will take some time, but if it is meant to be, it will happen. During this process, the biological parent needs to understand that he or she needs to remember date night with their child without the future step parent, so that the bond that has already been formed between parent and child will stay strong and the child will know that even though there is someone new in the picture, that the child is, and always will be number one no matter what.


Adopting a, "special needs child", can be the same way depending on the child's age, and even their diagnosis. Depending on the diagnosis, there may be doctor’s appointments, surgeries, treatments, and even hospital stays, but a parent needs to understand that although they are there through these things, this does not count as parent, child bonding time. Between appointments and hospital stays, parents and children need to make the time to go out and play a game of catch, have their hair and nails done, or even go out for a meal one on one, so that the bond stays strong. Some families might do a, "Daddy Daughter Day", or a, "Mommy Son Day", or a "Daddy Son Day", or a "Mommy Daughter Day" this way everyone gets the one on one time that they might want or need. When a child has grown up in the foster care system, depending on how old they are, and how much they remember about their biological parents, or what they have been told about their biological parents, they might be holding inside a ton of anger, hatred, and resentment, and need someone who is patient and loving to help them to get through their feelings and emotions to find the coping skills that they need to move on with their lives.


The bottom line is that by balancing your time, it should minimize the amount of stress that you carry on a day to day basis.

 

Categories: Parenting Techniques, Parenting Coping Skills, Coping Skills

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